Firsts

Firsts

In a world of firsts
A timeline of beginnings
Even an end
Is a first

Turn It Off

Turn It Off

There's a light
On my ceiling
Blink, Blink
It goes
Blink, Blink

These are the things
I notice
When all I really want
Is to shut things down
I'm not sad

Just tired
I'm tired of my brain
Running the 100 meter dash
Again and again and
Again

I want to find
The person with the starter's pistol
So I can rip it from their hands
And shove it down their throat
Stop the race

I want to stop
Look around
Shake hands with the other racers
Stop and sit
Talk

I want to rest my feet
And use my voice
But not for long
I want to shut down
Even my voice eventually

Eventually doesn't mean permanently
I'll get up at some point
And help the person
With the starter's pistol,
Back to their feet

I can't be angry at them
After all,
They were just doing their job.

With Words: An Unjust Description

With Words: An Unjust Description

Do not ask of me
A description of her heartbeat
That matches the rhythm
Beneath the almighty sea

A force grand in spectacle
And nurturing in faith
Faith in its presence
And tranquility

Do not ask of me
A description of her eyes
That harness the emotional spectrum
So that one might believe

To believe in something
Something real
Something greater
Dare I say divine

Do not ask of me
An understanding of her smile
That could make one sob
And heal the deepest wounds

All at once
She is so much
So much more
Than can be done justice

With words

Reflection

Reflection

Good morning
To the day
To the possibilities
That shine across her eyes

She smiles and says,
"Hey you."
And that's when that small sliver of sunlight
Floods the room and warms my soul

I don't want to get up
I want to stay
To stare
At that new day smile

"Stop it," she says
Cheeks flushed with the richest red
Even if I could
I wouldn't

She is who I want
This new day with her
Is the only kind of day
I could ever want

I want her to smile
I want her eyes to shine
I want her cheeks to flush
I want to be good enough for her

But she isn't there
She isn't smiling, eyes shining
Her cheeks aren't flushed
Because I'm not good enough

So why then does the sun shine?
Why do I smile?
From where does this warmth within flow?
Hope

I have hope in the new day
The possibilities I see
In those eyes
In the mirror

I'm not there yet
I have a ways to go
But I'll make it
And greet that new day saying,
"Good morning."

Upon the Canvas

Upon the Canvas

Painting memories in my mind

But its not the sights

Nor the sounds

That cover the canvas

Smiling as I reflect

Not upon the place

Not upon the time

But upon the people

Without the people

There would be nothing

But empty rooms

And hollow halls

Without the people

There are no smiles

No tears

No love

Without the people

My memories are lonely

Olive Juice Lullaby

Olive Juice Lullaby

A good morning kiss
With magic powers
"Oh, my Prince Charming has come,"
She awakens.

I love you son
I love you too mommy

A hallway covered in awards
It's the first thing,
The very first,
Any and all visitors see.

I love you son
I love you too mommy

Mommy's voice in my ear
Mommy's arms holding me close
Mommy's smiles lifting me up
Mommy's tears

I love you son
I love you too mommy

Her tears of joy
Of sorrow
They flow from her heart
A heart that loves

I love you son
I love you too mommy

A heart that loves
Completely
Wholeheartedly
Unconditionally

I love you son
I love you too mommy

Between the olive juice wishes
And the breakfast club stitches
Mommy has always been there
I love you mommy

In My Life - Professor Johnston

In My Life - Professor Johnston

There's this man
In my life.
He's funny
He's smart
And he approaches every single day with hope
No matter how dark the day appears to be
Because he is an inspiration defined by his smile
The kind of smile that lights up the dreariest room.
I'm glad I have Professor Johnston
In my life.

Exit

Exit

I was meant to see
The world, the whole of it
In all its glories

And this love I have for you
Is blocking my view
So I say goodbye

I'm sure you read these words
Tears in your eyes
I'm sure, because I wrote them
With tears in mine

I'm also sure
That you'll throw this paper away,
But keep the words
Forever in your heart

Just know that I too
Will keep these three special words,
Words you used to make me smile
Forever in mine

Farewell forever
In time I will fade
But the smiles, the memories, and the words
Will never say goodbye