My Fear Unmasked

My Fear Unmasked

I panic over the pause,

cringe over old conversations.

I believe myself to be disposable,

because I fear I may be disingenuous.

Friendships make me smile.

They bring me joy and purpose.

When those same friendships go silent,

I shutter and shiver in the cold.

Was it me?

Something I said?

Something I did?

I'm sorry my friends.

My Last Friend

My Last Friend

When tomorrow becomes the enemy

death becomes a sought after ally.

When waking up means being lonely

staying asleep becomes the dream.

When the one person you loved is gone

joining them again becomes the greatest desire.

For every couple that makes it to the end together

there is someone who will be there for the other,

and then become the one who must reach their end alone.

Survive Behind the Mask

Survive Behind the Mask

Do not go looking

for your role model in me.

I am a teetering tower

down on my last knee.

I am withering center

behind a fractured shell.

My mask is a hopeful smile

knowing within I don't deserve it.

Happiness? Praise? Accomplishments?

Deserved? Earned?

Neither; I am without

merit motivated altruistically.

I do what I must to survive.

I am not a good man.

I am a survivor.

No Finish Line I Don't Create for Myself

No Finish Line I Don't Create for Myself

Drowning, suffocating, longing

to be better.

Forever striving for the unobtainable,

a struggle I once accepted as eternal;

but I'm tired,

so tired

...tired.

Apologies to My Friends, Family, and Familiars

Apologies to My Friends, Family, and Familiars

Who am I
if not a friend?
A phony filled
to bursting
with false flattery
and fake friendship.
I'm sorry.
If there's one facet
of me I know to be true
it's just how sorry I am.

Call to Action

Call to Action

Find for me
a hero of stature:
one who will answer
the call to adventure.

Dangerous perils await.
Undeterred courage
will be a necessary trait,
to succeed in this challenge.

I do not demand
they be loyal to me.
Instead, be true
to heroism over villainy.

Quiet Thoughts Across Starlit Flight

Quiet Thoughts Across Starlit Flight

A flight through the void,
guided, in part, by a droid.

Calculations made at great speed,
powering forth the hero to their deed.

A greater power lies within;
the second edge is a path of sin.

A hero must choose
and with a wrong choice
many are doomed to lose.

Giving In

Giving In

Temptation is bred from fear,
a fear of not only loss,
but an even greater fear
of being powerless to prevent it.

In the face of fear,
those who live in darkness,
lash out against it;
their fear wears the mask of anger.

The mask takes on its own life,
draining it from the wearer
until the mask is the ruler
of a heart and mind lost.

Always Wanting Something More

Always Wanting Something More

What happened to the lines between:
good and evil,
confidence and arrogance,
success and selfishness?

What have we built?
What have we done?

Where can the world go,
to get away from us?
So quickly, are we prepared
to abandon this planet for a new one.

Why? What happened to the line between
contentment and avarice?

Moving On

Moving On

There is no beginning
Without an end
An inevitable cycle
That presents an opportunity
for legacy.

What we pass down
Isn't a simple handoff
It is instead
A precarious attempt
To lay a strong, yet flexible foundation.

To allow for one's legacy
to be used as the inheritor decides
requires genuine hope and humility.

Holding Hands

Holding Hands

One's hand holds

when one is cold,

when one is bold,

when one is sold

on an impossible idea;

the idea that love is real

in a world seemingly without,

in a world seemingly about survival

and not the arrival

of a special one.

To Thrive

To Thrive

Tomorrow is never promised

by anyone,

or anything,

at anytime.

Live.

Numb

Numb

There is no pain

in a body gone numb.

No fear of failure,

in a mind gone dumb.

With all five senses,

I determine my own path;

a path upon which

I will feel failure's wrath.

Failure will come to know me

as one who refuses to be

a quitter.

Turtle Dense

Turtle Dense

Turtle shells are dense enough

to protect an innocent's fragility.

Bird wings are aerodynamic enough

to fly above and beyond the threat.

Humans can choose to run and hide,

but it doesn't keep us from feeling the pain inside.

Different

Different

Sometimes, I wish I could laugh

when others laugh.

Sometimes, I wish I could risk

what others risk.

Other times, I like my laugh

and I like playing it safe.

All the time, I need to be me.

Darkest Hour

Darkest Hour

The lost hour of darkness
Birthed in shadow

And claimed by malice

The ignorant asleep in their coffins

In the darkness

The shattered spark of light

Let loose from a shining silver shooter

Awakens from within the power

The power of connection

The power of putpose

The power of will

They fight with this power against the inevitable

A battle of lost gains

It may seem

But it's the only way

To make it to another day

In the Pen Volume 3: #10: Hope

In the Pen Volume 3: #10: Hope

Heaven's light

Opens eyes sealed dark

Peerless shine

Eternal legend

In the Pen Volume 3: #9: Throw

In the Pen Volume 3: #9: Throw

Toss the ball!

Here! Here!

Run farther! Faster!

Open! I'm open!

We win! We win!

In the Pen Volume 3: #8: Teeth

In the Pen Volume 3: #8: Teeth

Tiny bones

Eating through food

Every time

Tummies rumble

Home cooking makes me smile

In the Pen Volume 3: #7: Fancy

In the Pen Volume 3: #7: Fancy

Fine-dressed dancers

Acrobats of rhythm

Nuance in motion

Crowds made of couples

Young and old alike