Living With Anxiety

Living With Anxiety

With every step
My heart strains
As if that last stair
Could be the last stair

I stagger into bed
My head falling upon pillows
Cushions meant for comfort
Cause the damn to collapse

My defenses are down
And the demons creep in
Demons born of my weaknesses

The weakness of fear
All-consuming doubt

The weakness of anger
Mostly turned inward

The weakness of obscurity
Never standing with a sense of clarity

The weakness of weakness
Unable to stand strong
No matter who
Tries so hard
Cares so much
To pull me to my feet

No matter how much others believe
No matter how many others there are

I stagger up stairs
With a heart as weak
As the rest of me

And once that small wall of strength
Melts away without a fight
That stair
Will be the last stair

And being weak
Or being strong
Won't matter anymore

And losing the fight to my weaknesses
Won't matter anymore

It just won't matter
Anymore